Text a girl and ask if you can "tap that"

me: hey V, whats up?
Her: it has! whats going on? we hardly talk anymore
me: yeah thats not my fault really i have called
her: no you have so whats new you still working at ****?
me: yeah which reminds me i have something to ask you
her: sure what?
me: so when you going to let me tap that?
her: huh?
me: when are you going to let me tap that?
her: this isnt shri, you must have found his phone I am going to call him at work and tell him what you're doing to his friends!!!


10 mins later my work phone rings

me: hello?
her: hey shri its V the person who has your phone is sending out rude texts to your friends
me: what my phone is right here and I dont get why you never let me know if I could tap that

at this point I start laughing couldnt hold it in anymore

her: WTF?? seriously? dude I was worried that you lost your precious iphone
me: anyways so whats your answer?
her: we'll see next time I am in town and how much booze you have, you ass
me: thats a start





the rest of the convo was just personal friend stuff between her and I, a college friend of mine that moved up to oregon but still has family here.


I may try it on another friend but knowing her she'll drive over to where I work and slap me across the face, i may do it just for fun to see her reaction.

 

ok well shes still texting me, i havent completely admitted it was a joke. I'll keep yall posted after work.

 

LOL..."You must spread more reputation around before giving more to Raven Lunatic".

I could text the wife this question but considering she just started her P, I know what the answer is going to be.

 

I must admit, I thought this thread was pretty stupid when I first opened it this morning. But now I'm laughing my ass off.

Keep up the good work, everyone.

I'm going to wait a while until my wife and her friends are nice and tipsy to do mine. Should be another hour or 2.

 

Me: I'm just going to get down to it... you going to let me tap that?
Her: Excuse me?!
Me: Whoops! Sorry mom, wrong Jazmine.

 

Wow...LOLLLLLL

 

I didn't know what to expect when I started but I ended up with solid gold!

I sent it to my ex-wife and my girlfriend.

First the one with the ex-wife:


me: hey how you doin?

her: great! how are YOU doin?

me: workin and wanting to go home. Hey I have an important question for you....

her: Did you just call me?

me: No, I have an important question though DAMNIT!

her: Oh god. What?

her: Okay s***. I'm trying to call you. What is your question?

**I didn't answer her calls**

me: when you gonna let me tap that?

her: I knew it! You little biatch LOL but seriously though....tomorrow?

me: I knew you missed it

her: I knew you missed it

me: LOL anyway I'm gonna tap that like a keg at a college party

her: why are you being a bad ass?

me: cause I know you like it when I'm a bad ass


Now the one with my girlfriend:


me: what's up beautiful?

her: Ah! Not much! How about u?

me: workin on wires and ready to get out of here. Hey I have a question for you...

her: Oh really!!!....well I'm sure i have an answer for u....what is the question?

me: when can I tap that?

her: What? Tap what?

me: that ass!

her: wow baby! u feelin a little horny? U can tap this ass anytime u want it!

me: Thats my girl!

 

Me: Hey girl, so when u gonna let me tap that?
Her: Huh?
Me: Is huh Vietnamese for Tuesday?
Her: your not making sense in htown today
Me: I'll be in HTown this weekend. How 'bout I tap it then?
Her: ur dumb


Conclusion: vietnamese chicks are lame

 

So which one are you tappin first?

 

I am currently weighing my options . This thread could single handedly cause the clutchfans community's sexual activity to increase,lol

 

Chow Yun Fat: Hey ViVi, when can I tap that?
Vivi: Hey i am waiting , baby .
Chow Yun Fat: So can I tap that?
Vivi: This time i know this is you's . i am so happy .
Chow Yun Fat: How do you know this is me and not some joke?
Vivi: because i call you to you phone dead . so i know you phone not with you .
Chow Yun Fat: Ok. For real, can I tap that?
Vivi: feel so sick. i dont know where you go .but i hope you come back tomorrow
Chow Yun Fat: I'm not going anywhere, I just want to tap...
Vivi: i dont want anything .. i am sorry baby, you the different .
Chow Yun Fat: Wait. So now I cannot tap?
Vivi: offen do something no brain . you teach me a lot things . you know i miss you baby. I love you

 

LOL!!

 

I lol'ed...

 

id go with the ex wife first since you can have your gf at anytime.

 

This exchange just took place between me and my friend Marcela:

Me: Hey, what are you doing tonight?
Her: Working
Me: Where?
Her: Same place
Me: Cool, you wanna **** when you get off work?
Her: What?
Me: Do you wanna have sex and hook up later on tonight?
Her: Haha you're funny
Me: Lol I guess that's a no
Her: Of course not, you think I'm going to get off from work tired and go to your house just for a ****. I don't even talk to you or see you that often. What kind of girl do you think I am?
Me: A dirty one
Her: You're crazy, I'll call you later.

 

Do you think either would find it wrong if you proposed a 3-way?

 

Sir, I wish I could give you rep points.

 

Somehow, it's just not as funny if you don't use the EXACT PHRASE.

 

Well I'm getting married to my gf in September so maybe I can propose it as a changing of the guard, like my ex-wife is passing me off to my new wife just in a 3some kind of way.