OK, I know that Avril Lavigne is no Bon Jovi, but I couldn't pass this one up. Too bad I didn't get the inspiration while sitting on the toilet... Constipated I’m here on white commode Trying so hard to drop my load And if I could only take a dump Break my slump I can’t go in night or day Maybe I should eat some hay And I’m sitting here and I don’t know why I can’t go To the bathroom, yes to the bathroom Watching the wall, too bad that is all I try to go but it happens so slow for me Tell me Why do I always have to be so constipated? I see the way my crap, it just ain’t coming out, it gets me frustrated Life’s like this, I And I groan and I moan and there’s pain When I strain and I feel that I just never will defecate And I just hate that I have to go get some ex-lax No no no I keep pacing to and fro Hoping this is when I go Drinking water helps but I just pee It’s making me Scream out on the toilet seat I should eat a lot more wheat I need more fiber in my diet I should try it Give me some greens, and I need some beans Time for some bran, a nice hot muffin I try to go but it happens so slow for me Tell me Why do I always have to be so constipated? I see the way my crap, it just ain’t coming out, it gets me frustrated Life’s like this, I And I groan and I moan and there’s pain When I strain and I feel that I just never will defecate And I just hate that I have to go get some ex-lax No no no Hold on, maybe this is it If not, I’ll have to throw a fit After all this work my ass is numb Here it comes Look at it go, I’m watching it flow The splash I hear, music to my ears That was really tough, so why was it rough for me Tell me (Repeat Chorus until you clog up the septic system)
