Conversation Hogs

Totally agree, my boss and I have a one on one each month, just to "check in", scheduled for 30 min and we end up BSing for 5 minutes and then a quick "everything is fine" and then we end the call, but I have to block out 30 min for something that I could e-mail him about........I suggested once a quarter but he wants it monthly..................WASTE OF TIME

 

Who's ever meeting it is should be able to manage this. You just need to add structure to the meeting.

Provide an agenda with estimated times for those agenda items. If it starts to go over on time for an agenda item say "sorry team we need to move one, in the interest of time". If the intent is to be more collaborative, you can call on people you think might have something important to say on the topic before this person interjected.

If no one else has anything important to say, shorten the meeting and give the time back.

 

I hate meeting draggers. Get in, get out. No need for all that babble. Is he trying to make himself look good? Is it pertinent to the meeting? Is it necessary. If not, I pull him aside. I’m pretty straight forwd with people.

I have never had a problem voicing how I feel with higher ups.

 

Or it's because us quiet ones know the person blabbing incessantly doesn't know what the f*** they're talking about and and that we'll be doing all the work anyway.

 

I do things like "okay, let's bring in some other voices on this." I mean, kinda obvious but not rude and others really appreciate it. I've also singled people out privately and said I appreciate their astute contributions but we need to make more space for other people and to move more quickly through our topics.

The phenomenon you describe is basically every meeting with university faculty. I hate it but am told I run a good meeting. Probably because I hate the meetings and everyone in them.

EDIT: And yes, I've often talked to people this way who out-rank me.

 

"Okay, we can always take this offline."

Translation - I actually have no intention whatsoever of talking with you about this later. Just shut up so I can keep this meeting moving.

 

Yeah, "that's a really interesting topic... for another meeting... at another company... in a different decade."

 

My company has a meeting-optional rule. If I don't think the meeting is useful, I don't go.

 

What would George from "Seinfeld" do? Do that!

 

How's that working out? I always thought those were kind of funny. The people that actually know what's going on generally don't show up leaving the people that don't know what's going on or just feel like taking a break showing up and discussing about things most there can't answer.

 

Honestly you need to know the dynamics, and that includes how you are viewed and the personality of who keeps hogging the conversation.

In the past I have literally said: "Do you ever stop talking? We get you in front of a group of people and you just don't stop."

However - I was known for being very blunt and I knew the person I called out was above me but also did not want conflict and generally liked me. They did not ramble on anymore.

If it is someone that is generally good hearted, you can bring it up to them in private in a conversation. I have done this as well. You would just wait for the right time and say something like - "You talk a lot in front of a group of people. Do you get nervous? If you do I can understand."

If the person is an *******, just stay out of it and watch Latvian p*rn on your phone until the meeting ends.

 

Sounds like the meeting facilitator is weak. Have an agenda and the facilitator should stick to it.

In the agenda, I also clarify exactly what decisions/requests are being covered so we clearly understand what's the point.
This makes it clear who should be doing most of the talking. This also fixes the issue of decision makers not showing up. If a key person doesn't show, we can agree to reschedule or make the decision without them.

Meetings where no decisions are made are usually low value meetings, aka status meetings.

 

"swish" up and down the halls?

 

Lol!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

Cut him off, "thank" him for his "valuable contribuition". Gaslight him and the "contribution".

 

Meetings with other depts aren't that critical to my own work. So it works fine for me. I imagine elsewhere in the company there is still social pressure and fear of looking unprofessional that keeps people coming to meetings.

 

I agree with several posters regarding agendas, must have with time limits. Also, create meeting rules where a person gets allotted only a certain amount to speak in each subject and have a strong timekeeper that will even call for time and moving on as needed. Review those rules before every meeting, for people that like to break them no matter how tedious.

 

I dunno - I think you should tell him that the jerk store called and that they’re running out of you.

 

Love this rule.

 

You're probably joking but I've also found this actually works.

People who blabber in meetings are usually good for the occasional "we need to do XYZ" or "Someone should manage ABC". I usually just put them down as the owner of that task/action/project and check on the progress of the project they recommended. They either start being more quiet or get so busy with BS work that they essentially created for themselves they don't have time to pontificate.